Eric: Mom! MOM! Come quick!
Mom: Uh, I'm kinda busy--what do you need?
Eric: I'm pooping, and it's SOOOO big! It's a HUGE poop! Come see!
Gee, tempting, but I think I'll pass...
Mom: I'm making breakfast--sorry, bud.
Several minutes pass.
Eric: MOM! I need some help here!
Mom: With what?
Eric: I need help wiping my butt!
Mom: You're a big boy; you know how to wipe your own butt.
Eric: But this is a BIG poop, and it's ALL OVER!
Sigh.
Mommy stands in the bathroom door. To observe. And guide from afar. My mantra is to teach self-sufficiency. Especially if it involves poop.
Mom: You're doing fine, Eric.
Eric: Yeah, but I really hate wiping butts. Wiping butts is so disgusting. It's so gross.
Tell me about it. Try wiping someone ELSE'S butt. Welcome to parenthood, son.
Mom: Well, it's better than NOT wiping your butt.
Silence. Eric digests this thought.
In a tone of awe suggesting that maybe, just maybe, Mommy is NOT dumber than a pile of rocks...
Eric: Yeeeaaaaaaah. That's true!
Nice to know someone out there is still awed by my brilliance.
2 comments:
Your stories are always so funny. My two youngest are great at wiping themselves and Emily at 7 years old still can't seem to manage.
I was just doing my Christmas cards and I don't know if I have your current address. Will you email that to me at rhondalynnm@cox.net. I don't know if I have your current email either.
Good times, good times... BTW- you could always get the kid those flushable wet wipes, they are pure genius.
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